40 Best Sarcastic New Year Quotes

Looking for sarcastic quotes for the new year? With the new year approaching, we are here with New Year Sarcastic Quotes. We have collected the best collection of sarcastic new year quotes, sayings, wishes, greetings, jokes, captions and status (with images and pictures) to welcome the new year with some humor and fun.

Sarcastic New Year Quotes

“My New Year’s resolution is to be more optimistic by keeping my cup half-full with either rum, vodka, or whiskey.”

“I would make a status saying happy new year! But I really don’t like any of you, nor do I want your year to be happy..”

Sarcastic Happy New Year Quotes

“This new year I resolved to lead a better life. Now all I have to do is find someone who will trade lives with me. Happy new year.”

“If you think nobody cares if you’re alive, try missing a couple of car payments in this New Year!!”

“You’d be in good shape if you run as much as your mouth. Happy New Year!”

“I don’t have a new year’s resolution you don’t need that crap when you’re perfect.”

“Remember you can reset your new year resolutions on January 14th (Orthodox new year) and February 8th (Chinese new year). After that, even I can’t help you.”

Sarcastic Happy New Year Quotes

“My new year’s resolution is to be more positive and less sarcastic. How long do you think this fantasy will last?”

“An optimistic stays up until midnight to see the new year in. A pessimist stays up to make sure the old year leaves.” – Bill Vaughn

“People say that laughter is the best medicine, your face must be curing the world.”

Sarcastic Funny New Year Quotes

“Not all girls are made of sugar and spice and everything nice. Some girls are made of sarcasm, wind, and everything fine.”

“I don’t believe in plastic surgery. But in your case, go ahead in this New Year.”

“New Year’s is just a holiday created by calendar companies who don’t want you reusing last year’s calendar.”

“Don’t expect any new year’s Resolutions from me. I plan on staying the same awkward, sarcastic, Foul-mouthed delight, That you’ve all come to know and love!”

Sarcastic Funny New Year Quotes

“It’s officially New Year’s Eve, you only have a couple of hours to do all the things you will resolve not to do in the new year.”

“Not all girls are made of sugar and spice and everything nice. Some girls are made of sarcasm, wind, and everything fine.”

“When I think about all my happiest memories from the past year, there’s one thing common denominator you. Happy new year!”

“I don’t call them new year’s resolutions. I prefer the term, “casual promises to myself that I’m under no legal obligation to fulfill.”

“My New Year’s resolution is to stop hanging out with people who ask me about my New Year’s resolutions.”

Happy New Year Quotes Funny

“Happy new year! Don’t forget to make some resolutions you’ll never keep and put up a new wall calendar you’ll never look at.”

“I will no longer wish you more success. You’ve had so much already. It should be mine this year! Happy new year to me!”

“Every New Year’s I have the same question: ‘How did I get home?”

Sarcastic New Year Wishes with funny memes

“Before I agree to 2023, I need to see some terms & conditions.”

“My new year’s resolution was going to be that I would stop being sarcastic, but dammit, I’m no quitter.”

“Many years ago, I made a New Year’s resolution to never make new year’s resolutions. Hell, it’s been the only resolution I’ve ever kept!”

Sarcastic New Year Wishes

“Many people look forward to the New Year for a new start on old habits.”

“People treat New Year’s like some sort of life-changing event. If your life sucked last year, it’s probably still going to suck tomorrow.”

“Today at the gym I asked a girl what her new year’s resolution is, She said “F*** you” so I’m pretty excited for 2022.”

“The proper behavior all through the holiday season is to be drunk. This drunkenness culminates on New Year’s Eve, when you get so drunk you kiss the person you’re married to.”

“New year’s day now is the accepted time to make your regular annual good resolutions. Next week you can begin paving hell with them as usual.” – Mark Twain

Funny Quotes About New Years

“I don’t even drink! I can’t stand the taste of alcohol. Every New Year’s Eve I try one drink and every time it makes me feel sick. So I don’t touch booze – I’m always the designated driver.” – Kim Kardashian

“Year’s end is neither an end nor a beginning but a going on, with all the wisdom that experience can instill in us.”

“Many years ago, I made a New Year’s resolution to never make new year’s resolutions. Hell, it’s been the only resolution I’ve ever kept!”

“If’ you’re born in September, it’s pretty safe to assume that your parents started their new year with a bang.”

“The proper behavior all through the holiday season is to be drunk. This drunkenness culminates on New Year’s Eve, when you get so drunk you kiss the person you’re married to.”

“New Year’s resolution last year needs to get in shape for spring. This year need to get in shape for airport screening.”

“Here comes another one for the motivated people, New Year resolution … More time on Treadmill.”

“To my friends, I wish you peace, love, and health. Blah, blah blah… screw that! I wish you lots of booze, and hope you win Lotto.”

Humor Sarcastic New Year Quotes

Everyone is excited for the happiest day of the year, which is fast approaching and will be New Year’s Day in the year 2023. This day cannot come soon enough for many. The year 2023 ushers us a fresh start for yet another year of our lives, which brings us one step closer to retirement. We felt it would be fair to give you with some snarky quotations for the new year as the new year gets closer.

These sarcastic quotes are precisely what their name implies; they are extremely caustic in nature, and while you are reading them, you will find yourself grinning broadly more often than not. Examine the sayings that are contained in this section.

When people start discussing the forthcoming new year, one of the first things that come up in the conversation is the resolutions that they want to make on the big day itself. This is because people traditionally make their resolutions on the first day of the new year. The evening before the start of the new year, many people make it a tradition to sit down and think about the goals they want to accomplish in the next year.

These resolutions may include both time-honored aspirations, such as being healthy, and more modern goals, such as improving oneself. There are many sayings and phrases with mocking tone that make fun of those who set goals for themselves at the beginning of each new year. You’re going to crack up laughing at these incredibly nasty statements, that much is clear.

Humorous Quotes About New Year

A wonderful collection of sarcastic New Year’s quotations that we have prepared for you and presented here in this area of the website can be found on this page. You are free to go through the quotations, choose the ones that speak to you the most, and then have a conversation about those quotations with the people who are closest to you.

On this, the last night of the year, we have put together a compilation of the wittiest and most sarcastic sayings that we could locate so that you may read them and enjoy them. Our major purpose is to leave an impact on you with the quotations that we offer, and we are convinced that we have accomplished this goal this time around with the help of the quotations that we have provided.

Choose a sarcastic comment from the collection of New Year Sarcasm Quotes that we have provided here and keep thinking about it throughout the day on New Year’s Eve if you want to keep a smile on your face throughout the day. Your frame of mind will undoubtedly benefit from doing this on the first day of the new year.

Thank you for reading this. Which sarcastic new year quotes did you like in the above list? Please let us know your favorite sarcastic new year Messages in the comments section.

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